As the author of the first body language book for gay men, I am often asked how male body language affects dating between men. The answer is enough. But to understand why certain postures, gestures and expressions make you more attractive to gay men, you must understand the 5 main principles of gay body language:
# 1. Words lie, bodies don’t.
The truth seeps from our bodies like a bucket of water full of bites. As soon as we stick a finger in one hole, another opens. You may think it looks calm, cool, and collected, but look down – your foot hits the ground like a woodpecker. Sex signals bounce everywhere every time gay men get together, and are sent out with heads, eyes, arms, hands, legs, and feet. Yes, feet. Long story, read on.
# 2. Your body language changes when you see someone attractive. And normally you are not aware of it.
Hidden camera studies show that a man’s posture changes when he sees someone who turns him on. He, or more specifically, YOU, will:
- Pull your stomach. (To look more elegant)
- Roll your shoulders back (to take up more space)
- Puff up your chest (to appear bigger)
- Raise your head (to appear taller)
- Extend your jaw (to look more dominant)
It is a way of grooming. Researchers call it “autoerotic signaling.”
# 3. Body language doesn’t just reflect your internal emotions. He creates them.
Keeping your body language “open” isn’t just essential for changing other people’s moods and attitudes; it is essential to change yours. This concept doesn’t just apply to your hands or palms; it applies to everything. The more you “fake” open and attractive gestures and expressions, the more genuinely open and attractive you will become.
Don’t take my word for it; Test it. Cross your arms against your chest. What did you notice? After a few minutes, you will become quieter, more introspective, and less likely to smile or laugh. It’s the body’s built-in feedback loop – ‘bad mood’ body positions result in bad mood, period. It also works the other way around. Uncross your arms and keep your palms open for a couple of minutes. Hmm. Is that his spirit soaring or is he just happy to see me? If you want to attract gay men, pay attention to this principle.
# 4. The best way to meet and attract gay people is through open and attractive gestures.
Keeping your body open and attractive is so important to attracting guys that almost nothing else matters. If you cross your arms, for example, you could also spray on man spray. This applies to any gesture or movement that forms a barrier: clasping your hands, crossing your legs, closing your knees, stooping, or holding anything that blocks your chest, heart, and stomach.
# 5 Our bodies point towards men we like and away from men we don’t like.
He likes you? Look down. Men unconsciously point their feet. It’s our way of saying “Hubba Hubba”. Once, he was in a coffee shop killing a hottie who was ignoring his friend. He turned his body towards me, made a lot of eye contact, and directed most of the conversation to me. Yet despite all those positive signs, he wasn’t feeling the vibe. My napkin fell to the floor and when I reached down to pick it up, I cursed under my breath. His feet pointed at his friend! Sure enough, I saw them on a date a few days later. Guilty feet have no rhythm but they never lie.
Putting it all together. If you want to meet gay men, pay attention to these five basic principles of gay male body language. Whether you’re the chaser or the hunted, the same principles apply: your body language changes when you see a guy who appeals to you (so keep that in mind), you can consciously use certain body language tactics to change your mood. . Use open and inviting gestures and finally, if you want to know if a gay guy is attracted to you, watch where he is pointing (especially his feet).