How do you make decisions? When you’ve narrowed it down to just two or three options, what mechanisms do you use to get to The Ultimate Choice?
When you think about it, you can see that you are making decisions all day. What to wear, what’s for breakfast, how to solve this problem, where to put that object. We are always making decisions and we always have a choice, even if it doesn’t always seem like it.
Most decisions are so easy that they go unnoticed, automatically. You grab your raincoat after hearing a wet forecast, without dying. Other decisions require more conscious thought: will your shoes be pink or purple today?
This post is about those moments when the task of making a decision has you deeply confused, when the choice is extraordinary, difficult, not the everyday kind.
People often freeze in such situations, but here’s a super simple way to sort your thoughts so you can continue.
1. Find a clean notebook and pen. Sit in a quiet place. Open your notebook and write a statement that summarizes the decision you need to make.
Will I move to New City or stay in Home Town?
2. Write freely for several minutes, letting whatever comes out of your pen make its mark without guidance. Do not stop writing, filling in nonsense if necessary. Try this without even lifting your pen off the page the entire time.
New City has been on my mind for the last six months since that opportunity came up and Kristin told me about…
3. Take a deep breath. Imagine that you select an option that is available to you. Write a description of the result of making that choice. Now do the same for each of the available options. Spend a few minutes on each option. Use a timer if you like, to make sure you give each possible option equal time.
In New City I will have to find a new job and a new home and everything new that is scary but also exciting…
In Home Town I can keep in touch with my friends and I can have my cat, but this house is very run down…
That’s enough. You can put your notebook away for now. But make sure you come back the next day. Read your previous entry. Repeat the sequence again, if you are so moved.
If it looks like you’re close to making a decision but want a little more “proof”, try the following sequence.
1. Write a list of words associated with the decision. Freely write on each word for a couple of minutes.
Work, house, cat…
2. List the pros and cons of making each choice. Do this in parallel columns, so you can easily compare.
3. Turn to a new page in your notebook. Look around your surroundings, wherever you are. Taking a random cue from your environment, write for five to ten minutes. Forget your decision making for the moment.
night is coming The horizon shines with the faintest pink. It’s so delicate! And the fireflies are rising. They’re on the prowl, which makes me laugh a little…
Again, put the notebook away overnight and then read again the next day.
Decisions often seem life or death to us, which causes us great stress. These journaling exercises are tools for digging deeper into the resources we possess that have been hidden under the many mists of perception. Accessing your deep intelligence in this way powerfully relieves stress and builds confidence.
By simply writing in a journal, letting the pen mediate our thinking, we can come into close contact with inner knowing, the inner self that can naturally identify the choice that will serve us best.
Having trouble making a big decision? Mari L. McCarthy, Personal Journal Specialist, can guide you through the process. Information is at http://www.createwritenow.com/journaling-services/.