So you’ve been dumped, spent some time alone, and now you’re dying to get in touch with your ex-girlfriend. What is he up to? Where is she? Contacting her ex is a crucial part of getting back together, but she must be done carefully or you’ll scare her off.
Etiquette for contacting your ex girlfriend requires that you leave your ex alone for a while after the breakup, and I hope you did. Too many guys cross the line when it comes to staying in touch after a girl dumps them. They think it’s okay to call and email their ex-girlfriends, leave them notes on MySpace, or post on their ex’s Facebook wall. Texting is the worst offender: If your girlfriend broke things up with you and you’re still trying to text her every day, you’re really shooting yourself in the foot of her. Nothing you can say is going to interest her right now, at least not until she misses you.
So how do you make your ex miss you and love you again? When walking away By not contacting your ex to the point where she thinks she’s disappeared off the face of the Earth. When your girlfriend breaks up with you, she always looks over her shoulder to see how you’re doing. It makes her feel desirable to see that you’re upset and that you miss her. It’s comforting to know that the breakup is affecting you. Deny her these things, and she’ll feel insecure about her decision…and very curious. You’re curious about what you’re doing, who you’re doing it with, and why you seem to have gotten over the breakup so easily.
These are the things that will make your ex call you. But what if he hasn’t done it yet? There are ways to contact her that are not intrusive. I’ll list them below, but keep in mind that she should have broken off contact with her ex for at least a month before making these moves:
return of property – In the first days and weeks after the breakup, this excuse to contact your ex-girlfriend is quite weak and contrived. But after a month? You can always call or email your ex to let them know what “stuff” they left at your house. You can’t call about something stupid like a toothbrush or an audio CD, but if your ex left behind clothes or a bunch of belongings, you can always make this seemingly innocent connection.
Congratulations – If your ex-girlfriend has achieved some recent achievement, you can make a friendly call to congratulate her. She maybe she graduated from school, she got a promotion at work, she had a birthday… things like that. Calling to say congratulations is a great way to reconnect without seeming like you have ulterior motives, and your ex will actually think she’s sweet that you remembered her today.
family consultations – Dating someone usually brings you closer to their family, which can be another good way to get back in touch with your ex. If your mom was having a scheduled operation, call to see how she fared. If her brother went to the army, call a week later to ask how she’s doing. Being close to her family gives you a half-decent excuse to reconnect once or twice after the breakup, especially if you’ve dated this girl for a long time.
There are many other great ideas for contacting your ex when you want them back, and these are just a few. Still, having your ex girlfriend call you is the best option. Learn all you can about how to properly communicate after the breakup, and more importantly, know what she’s going to say when that contact is made. The right moves, made at the right times, can put your ex back in a mindset where she misses you and she wants you back in her life.